A couple of years ago I took tennis lessons with a really fun group of women, and I am absolutely convinced that we were the highlight of pro Steven Welt's week. Not so much because of our tennis prowess, but because of our uncanny ability to take any conversation and lead it straight into the gutter. (Full disclosure: yes, it was usually me leading the charge. Shocker.) Fast forward to last Friday and one can only imagine what transpired when Jamie busted out the Beaver.
Easy fellas. It was a hat. But not just any hat, it was her grandmothers real beaver hat, which I was surprised (mortified?) to discover J-Me's grandfather killed and had fashioned into a hat all by himself, with the help of a haberdasher, natch. (aside to Kenny - I make hats!) Keep in mind that my family hails from NYC so any furs in our closets came from the safe confines of a Long Island boutique, where one needn't think about the fact that one's gaw-geous new coat used to be an actual woodland creature. We know better now. Long live faux fur! And while we're on that topic - my friend Brandy would like to know...is there an actual farm where they raise pink bunnies? Yes, I told her, right next to the boneless chicken ranch. Sorry - I digress. Back to Jamie's beaver - she busted it out (the hat people, the hat) at our party to get a group consensus as to whether or not it was in fact, Fug or Fab. I think we all agreed, after reverting to the requisite 12 year old beaver humor for quite some time, that it was truly fab in theory, but alas, in reality was too small. They musta had some tiny heads back then. So Jamie came up with the brilliant idea of converting it into a muff. Well. You can imagine the fun we had with THAT one. And with that, dear readers, I'm going to let you take it from here, because my parents read this blog and well, I think I've made them proud enough already.
Easy fellas. It was a hat. But not just any hat, it was her grandmothers real beaver hat, which I was surprised (mortified?) to discover J-Me's grandfather killed and had fashioned into a hat all by himself, with the help of a haberdasher, natch. (aside to Kenny - I make hats!) Keep in mind that my family hails from NYC so any furs in our closets came from the safe confines of a Long Island boutique, where one needn't think about the fact that one's gaw-geous new coat used to be an actual woodland creature. We know better now. Long live faux fur! And while we're on that topic - my friend Brandy would like to know...is there an actual farm where they raise pink bunnies? Yes, I told her, right next to the boneless chicken ranch. Sorry - I digress. Back to Jamie's beaver - she busted it out (the hat people, the hat) at our party to get a group consensus as to whether or not it was in fact, Fug or Fab. I think we all agreed, after reverting to the requisite 12 year old beaver humor for quite some time, that it was truly fab in theory, but alas, in reality was too small. They musta had some tiny heads back then. So Jamie came up with the brilliant idea of converting it into a muff. Well. You can imagine the fun we had with THAT one. And with that, dear readers, I'm going to let you take it from here, because my parents read this blog and well, I think I've made them proud enough already.
3 comments:
I look good in fur, particularly down here in Miami when it's chilly. Beavers offer quite a lot. They are wonderful little rodents full innate abilities and plenty of connotations. In Latin America they are not that popular, but their sexy cousin, the carpincho, is one hell of a mammal and the largest rodent in the whole wide world, and for some odd reason or other, it implies many other things in modern culture. I really like your carpincho, is a statement that can be easily misunderstood. This sweet little animal is bred in captivity for its delicate meat and soft hide. That might have something to do with whatever I am talking about. It used to be illegal to engage in carpincho commerce, and there are still many restrictions, because the carpincho ought to be protected. But carpincho products are all over the place. Oh my, I say everytime I touch one.
I seem to remember that a photo was taken whilst fair Jamie was wearing the beaver. Would it be possible to post it so we that everyone can get the visual?
I agree with Claiborne. It is one thing to talk about your beaver. It is another to show it. Go ahead girl and let your beaver flag fly.
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